Today I found them. The Rose Coloured Glasses. When I wrote my post about my grandma, the day she died, I commented:

She was the type of woman who told it like it is, but everything was always seen through rose coloured glasses — with a pragmatic edge that made us all love her even more.

Today, I went with my parents, cousin and aunt and uncle and we worked on cleaning out my grandma’s place.  While we were there I found a pair of my grandma’s sun glasses. With rose coloured lenses.  That meant a lot.  I collected a few things, and my mom has a few other things for me at their place.   My grandma was a woman of sentiment and caring: She kept an ornament I made when I was a child.
I’m glad I was able to do it, help out, it was tough on my mom, and I didn’t help that much. I was cleaning out a closet of Christmas ornaments. I found something rather important that my family had been looking for. But it wasn’t something that was easy to find. It had me shocked. It shocked my mom. It was a tough tough day.  But I’m glad I could support them. It had to be found.  So this evening I’m relaxing.
I’m also looking at my things, and I’ve been in a purging phase anyhow, and now I want to purge more. Spending time cleaning my grandma’s place makes me realize that I don’t want people do have to do that for me.  It may be a morbid or a dramatic thing to consider, but, really, if I can live my life in such a way not to be cluttered with stuff, that is perhaps a better way to live.  I don’t want people who are grieving for me, my children perhaps their children having to go through things sorting out what is what and what to keep what to toss.  I would like people to simply be able to find what they want to keep — what’s important to them, and the rest sent to charity.
So I purge. I’ve been going through things, have been for the last several weeks. Now I’m more motivated to purge. Get rid of those things I don’t love, don’t cherish, those things I wouldn’t want someone to have to sort through.  It’s a step I need to do as I continue on this journey towards living life well, towards wholeness and health. Because I want to be happy, strong, and well enough to live my life looking through rose coloured glasses but with my grandma’s pragmatic edge.