I had a round orchid vase (one of those small globe like things where florists will float one orchid). I was given this vase with one orchid floating in it for my 19th birthday.  After the orchid was dead, I used it to hold dried flowers. Whenever I’d be given flowers (I LOVE receiving flowers…). I will admit that it was rare for boyfriends to bring me flowers (for anyone who’s reading this, you’re welcome to pass this hint along… :P), but it did happen on occasion and when it did I would end up drying the flowers and I’d keep the buds in this round vase.  I’d also get flowers from my family or for myself and I’d keep a bud and dry it too. But now, it’s time to get rid of the past, dead flowers from relationships that are dead. So as I’m cleaning and organizing at the moment I am tossing them. They are gone. I’ll keep the vase.
I tried to go to Pilates tonight. It felt better than I was expecting, but I’m sore now. That has me grumpy. I miss my regular life.  I also saw invites for parties come through and because of the rest of my personal life, I don’t know if I should go  (never mind that I don’t get the conflict between the one that was created tonight and one that was already existing). One is from the guy who caused the hallowe’en saga — should I let water be under the bridge and go or should I boycott????  Sigh. I don’t really have the energy to go into this, but I DON’T want to be on this place in my life. It’s not something I’ve asked for and not something I particularly want.  I’m a bundle of stress right now, and I have no release. This whole not being able to exercise thing is starting to get to me. Withdrawal sucks.